Dear Reader,
Friday. Friday was just not a good day at all. At all. I woke up to the news that my sister's boyfriend of over 2.5 years suddenly broke up with her. Talk about some shock. So, things have not been well the past couple of days as she's been understandably upset and mad.
A couple hours later, I got on the computer and read about a shooting in CT. Not another shooting. This time, it's a school again. An elementary school. My heart drops into my stomach. 26 people dead, 18 of them children. I feel sick to my stomach. I don't know a single one of these people or these children, but my heart just breaks. THe reports are all a jumble and the news can't get things straight and name the wrong man.
Finally, I hear it was 20 children and six adults who were murdered. I'm not calling it shot. I'm calling it what it was. Murder. These children were murdered in cold blood. No reason at all for it. Not one person in that school deserved to die that day. Not one. Not one reason parents dropped their children off Friday morning and never picked them up that afternoon, will never get to see their children alive again, will never get to hear their voices or play games with them or see them open their presents with excitement on Christmas morning, presents their parents likely already got for them. Instead, 20 parents will bury their children needlessly. And my heart just breaks.
I don't know these people at all. I live many miles away, but I cried. I just cried for everyone there, all those people, those children, those parents. I wish the news would stop giving fame to these psychopaths. Copycat crimes would stop happening. I fear for my future children. Schools should be a safe place, not a place to die. It makes me concerned about sending my own children I may have one day to school. I have to wonder if they'll be safe. Will I see them alive after I drop them off in the morning? No parent should ever have to think about that. No parent should have to fear someone murdering their child while they are in school. No parent should have to fear for their child's safety in a school.
Today, my heart still breaks. I think back to other tragedies, needless tragedies. I think of Dunblane Primary mostly, just as sad and tragic as Friday's massacre. I want to cry, scream and punch a dummy bag. And if I feel this way about people I don't know, I think of the families involved and what they must be feeling and I cannot comprehend. I hope I never have to know. No one should have to know. I have a little brother in high school and I worry about him. I shouldn't have to though. No one should.
Since Friday it's been raining and dreary here and I live a few hundred miles from CT. I can't help but think Mother Nature is mourning with us a little. I was only a couple hours from Virginia Tech when it happened and had relatives with family there at that time. Thankfully, none were harmed that horrible day. I was in Colorado when the Aurora theatre murders occurred. Thankfully, we were in Golden and didn't see a midnight movie, but one night there and hear that sickening news. When will these senseless tragedies stop.
Friday, hundreds of children have likely lost their faith in Santa. Hundreds of children's sense of security and the world being good was shattered. And it's not fair. And it's not okay. And it's not right. And it's okay to think that and to be angry and to be upset as long as you hurt no one else in the process. I hope these children can grieve properly and the parents too. I hope they'll get the support they need because they should know and I'm sure they do, the world supports them.
Tomorrow wear green and white in memory of the victims of Sandy Hook Elementary and all the horrible tragedies that are as senseless as these.
With love,
CMarie
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